This one hits a little closer to home.............
Shirley Ann Jackson
The Honorable Doctor Jackson has a long and distinguished resume. Sorta like my johnson. She's on the Board of Directors the NYSE, Smithsonian, IBM, FedEx, and a bunch of other places. She's also the President of our dear old Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute in Troy, NY. You wouldn't know it by her attendance record at the 'Tute, but she makes seven figgas. On a related note, her picture is in the dictionary under "affirmative action."
At RPI she's known for being anti-fraternity, anti-faculty senate, pro-$300 million concert halls, pro-parking fines, and anti-admit as much tail as we can to attract better hockey players. Doctor Jackson is married to Professor Washington and they live happily in Troy guarded by a crack squad of Public Safety officers.
You can email her at president@rpi.edu, but don't expect a response. If you're lucky, you'll see her at convocation, when you shake her hand along with 4,999 other nerds, or at commencement, when she's sitting on her throne looking down on the unwashed mass of coeds and their families.
shirleyyyy come out to play-ay(say it in the warriors theme and tell me you dont crack a smile) - phony
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