JERRY: So the roommate laughed at everything I said.
GEORGE: Wow.
JERRY: It was a great sounding laugh too, kind of lilting and feminine--none of those big coarse "ha's." You know those?
GEORGE: Oh yeah: HA-A-A, HA-A-A.
JERRY: Yeah.
GEORGE: Hate the big coarse "ha." Hate those.
JERRY: And the worst part of course is that she also possessed many of the other qualities prized by the Superficial Man.
GEORGE: I see.
JERRY: So as you can see, I've got a bit of a problem here.
GEORGE: Well, if I hear you correctly--and I think that I do--my advice to you is to finish your meal, pay your check, leave here, and never mention this to anyone again.
JERRY: Can't be done, huh?
GEORGE: The Switch?
JERRY: "The Switch."
GEORGE: Can't be done.
JERRY: I wonder.
GEORGE: Do you realize in the entire history of western civilization no one has successfully accomplished the Roommate Switch? In the Middle Ages you could get locked up for even suggesting it!
JERRY: They didn't have roommates in the Middle Ages.
GEORGE: Well, I'm sure at some point between the years 800 and 1200--somewhere--there were two women living together.
JERRY: The point is I intend to undertake this. And I'll do it with or without you. So if you're scared, if you haven't got the stomach for this, let's get it out right now! And I'll go on my own. If not, you can get on board and we can get to work! Now what's it going to be?
GEORGE: All right, dammit, I'm in.
JERRY: I couldn't do it without you.
GEORGE: All right. Let's get to work.
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